The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Perfect Burger

Cooking burgers for Memorial Day could be a pretty big hassle, especially if you're cooking for a large group.

I make some pretty mean burgers.. ones that trump any restaurant chain. I don't exactly have an exact measurement of the ingredients, but they're proportional to the amount of beef by about a 1 : 5 ratio.

Ingredients-

• A1 Steak Sauce
• Heinz 57
• Mrs. Dash
• Garlic Powder
• Salt
• Pepper
• Dash of Chili Powder
• Bacon Bits (this one's just as important as the steak sauce)
• (Optional) BBQ Sauce - Use tomato-based BBQ sauce 

Grilling Tips-

• FORM THE MEAT. Like they say, you can't go far without a good foundation. When you form your patties, use the palm of your hand and go from the middle of the patty to the outside and around in a spiral formation. Roll your hand like you're flattening out play-doh. Then, cup your hands and form the patty into a circle.. flip the burger over, then repeat the pressing process. I'd only do this about 2 times unless you messed up. Do it too much.. and your burgers will be tough..to little and your burgers will fall apart on the grill. For some help, check out this article that uses the top of a large jar to help your form uniform burgers.  Form The Perfect Burger

• DON'T PRESS YOUR BURGERS. People think it looks cool or professional to slap the spatula on top of your burgers.. don't do this unless you like dry, flavorless burgers.. just don't do it.

• CLEAN your grill. The more food residue on there, the better chance your food has to stick to the grill. For extra insurance, dip a paper towel in some olive oil and wipe it on the grilling surface.
• COOK your food all the way. Cooking a burger Medium and below is a big risk for home cookers without a thermometer
• FLIP your burgers no more than 3 times. This ensures the juices stay put where they should be, and it won't dry out your burgers. The 3rd flip is for putting on the cheese. Cheese is good.
• CHEESE IT. Put on your cheese after the 3rd flip, turn the heat to low, and close the lid. check every minute and a half to make sure all is well in burger heaven.
• MOVE AND TOAST. Move your cheese-topped burgers to one side of the grill with the heat on low, cut off the other side of the burner off and place your buns burger-side down and leave them on there for about 3 minutes, you want a light toast feel, not crunchy toast.. WATCH THEM CAREFULLY.. once they start to toast.. they can burn faster than you can close the lid.. but WELL worth the extra work. (Top side toasting is optional)
• NAKED BUNS. Leave your burgers and buns separate until it's time to put them together.. all that hard work toasting your buns (ha) would be ruined if you put your juicy burger on top and let it sit.
• CONDIMENTS. For the love of God.. put your condiments on the BOTTOM of your burger. A good rule is a thin layer of mayonnaise (again..to protect your toasting skills) with the "liquids" on the bottom, and the "solids" on top. If this needs anymore explanation.. go to McDonalds.

 So that about covers it, the perfect burger is only a grill away. So get out there and burn some eyebrows and enjoy the fruit of your labor.

Happy Grilling